Building Strength to Maintain Positivity

Building anything takes time. If you are seeing a project completed in a short amount of time then that project most likely has a big support system. I do not consider myself someone with a big support system, so I recognize figuring things out on my own is going to take time, patience, and persistence.

Building strength refers specifically to your ability to endure, remain patient, and persist with yourself, others, and the situation. Having a disability makes it all too easy to play the disability card or to give up completely when things feel like they are not happening quickly enough. To play the disability card is to give up your independence, something I personally aim to avoid as much as possible (mostly because I hate being told what to do). Furthermore, to give up is as impulsive a decision as throwing a tantrum or those doughnuts I ate after dinner last night.

Building strength is a necessary first step toward maintaining an inner positivity. The second step is narrowing in on one piece of the pie at a time. Do not try to accomplish everything at once, lest you are putting yourself at risk of finishing nothing. This is particularly true if you tend to struggle with finishing tasks on a regular basis. Avoid the temptation to leave something unfinished, even if something else feels more important. The ability to finish a task before moving on to the next one is going to keep building you up by adding a sense of accomplishment, pride, and self-confidence.

Now comes the step that brings it all together: be your own cheerleader. Especially in the world of the disabled, it seems as though more people are trying to prove how much people with disabilities cannot do as opposed to accepting the longer list of things they do, and do well, everyday. We are all caught up in our own sob story, and some people are going to be able to listen, care, and provide support despite what they themselves might be facing in their personal lives. More often then not, however, you would be sharing your story with people who are not listening, but rather thinking about how your story is not as bad as their story, or their friend of a friend’s story, or their great uncle’s story. You get my point. Most people are going to search their mind for a one-upper to demonstrate to you or to prove to themselves their sob story is worse. The individuals who are capable of providing quality listening, caring, and support despite their own issues are few and far between. Thus, you are going to need to develop the ability of carrying yourself through the “between” periods. When you cheer on yourself you provide yourself encouragement, you give yourself rewards when you score points, and you do a little dance for yourself at half time just because it is fun. Your half time dance can be anything you want it to be such as a half gallon of ice cream, painting, writing, junk TV, whatever. Keep the pep up, even if you have to fake it, because you are going to need to be able to be your own support figure at times. That is just a fact.

In reality, the ability to build strength and maintain posivity are  inner skills no one can develop within you. If you feel like you struggle with these skills then it is worth taking time to work on them, practice them, and master them. Your ability to endure, persist, and have patience with yourself others, and situations is absolutely vital to long term posivity.

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